He's Stopped Listening, Now What?

It can be very frustrating when your boyfriend or husband has stopped listening to you; especially when you’re talking to him about something important, he seems to be listening, but later on you realized he hadn’t listened to you properly at all! But what can you do? And how can you find out what’s he really thinking?

What Doesn't Work

First of all, taking out your frustration by scolding him about it isn’t going to work. He’s just going to tune out even more. However, one way to get through to him would be to talk to him like a man. You see, men think and talk in straight lines. Women think and talk in circular, roundabout ways. So if you tend to talk to him in a roundabout way about things, even if they’re important, he may have developed a habit of tuning out because it seems to him that you never get straight to the point.

What Does Work

If you want him to listen to what you have to say, you may have to be clear, concise and direct. Just like a man. Another good tip is to talk to him when he’s not distracted. So if he’s reading or watching TV and is thoroughly engrossed and you start talking to him, it would be tempting for any man to tune out what he thinks is unimportant chatter. When you want to talk to him, pick a time when he’s not watching TV or doing something he enjoys. If you pick the right time, he may be more willing to pay you proper attention.

Once you’ve got his attention, make sure you are clear, concise and direct. He’ll appreciate your effort to communicate with him on his level. Ask him if this is the way he’d like you to communicate with him. If he says yes, then you know what you need to do in order to have him listen to you.

Now you’ve got him listening to you, it will be easier to find out what he is thinking about. He may even tell you, now you’re communicating in “his” language. Lastly, try not to nag him. The woman men adore doesn’t nag. Instead, she makes sure she has their attention before she speaks, and still has it when she’s finished the conversation.